It is easy for despair to creep in when we find ourselves in prolonged, undesirable situations; whether that is having to look for work, getting out of debt or having to do work at a job we don’t enjoy. Any effort might seem hopeless, but I can attest to the fact that taking constant action, even if the actions seem tiny, gets you to the other side; eventually. And it is this last word – eventually - that is key.
A few years ago, I learned of a concept called the “Mindset of Grounded Optimism”. This mental tool transformed the way I think about and approach difficult situations that take time to resolve. It has helped me to develop the grit required to not to give up.
I read about grounded optimism in Shannon Huffman Polson’ book 'The Grit Factor: Courage, Resilience and Leadership in the Most Male Dominated Organisation in the World'. Shannon was the first women to pilot the Apache attack helicopter in the US army and is the founder of The Grit Institute. She explains that to develop the grit required to persevere in difficult endeavours you need to become a grounded optimist; someone who regardless of the difficulties, will retain faith that they will prevail in the end whilst confronting reality.
After further research, I came across the same concept in Jim Collins’ book “Good to Great”. In his book, Collins tells the story of Admiral James Stockdale. Admiral James Stockdale was the highest-ranking United States military officer in the "Hanoi Hilton" prisoner-of-war (POW) camp during the Vietnam War, where he was kept prisoner for 8 years. During that time, he lived through the most horrific trials and did the most extraordinary things to save his life and the lives of others. Not only did Admiral Stockdale survive the ordeal but he thrived afterwards. He returned to the US to his wife and led a rich and fulfilling life. Jim Collins had the opportunity of interviewing him in the 1990’s and asking him how he managed to survive the ordeal unbroken. Admiral Stockdale explained that he never lost faith in how the story would end. He never doubted that he would get out and turn the experience into the defining event of his life. In his own words:
“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end...with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality...”
A simple yet powerful tool, grounded optimism can help us get through life’s challenges. Taking the job search as an example; the process is undeniably a tough emotional and mental challenge; a long journey that will test our endurance to withstand rejections but by adopting a mindset of grounded optimism, we can reframe the challenge as:
I know that if I persist, I will, eventually, find a job. I won't be jobless for the rest of my life,
BUT
I also understand that even after 8 interviews, I might not get this job and I will have to apply again and have a new round of interviews and I might not get that job either, or the next, or the next...But I will, eventually find one.
In the end, I will prevail.
Such a simple yet powerful mindset shift